Name: Elizabeth Black
Title: Purr (Based on "Puss In Boots")
Publisher: New Dawning Bookfair
Genre: Twisted Fairy Tale
Size: Short Story
ASIN: B005407APY
Cost: $2.99
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Blurb:
The alluring puss in boots Muca aspired for her master to become the richest and most respected man in the land, but her job was cut out for her. Could she convince the local farmers to trust in her against the vicious ogre who ruled the region?
Excerpt:
"Good afternoon, cat! How went your trip to the king?"
She smiled, happy he recognized her. She gave the farmer a confident smile, eager to continue her plan. She strode to him, and gave him a deep, elegant bow. "Very well, my friend. He enjoyed the gifts of my Master, the Marquis of Carabas." The farmer's wife nursed her infant, her full breasts spilling out from beneath her flowing cotton blouse. Such a hypnotic sight! An urge overwhelmed her to take a suck herself. She had a weakness for soft, enormous breasts, especially ones filled with milk. Her groin warmed, and shifted her stance to take the pressure from her arousal. "You have a fine infant there. How old is he?"
"Six months, and my wife has lost all her baby weight. Those breasts are especially nice, particularly late at night when it's cold outside." He smiled, walked to Muca, and laid a hand on her shoulder. "I see you're as enraptured as I am of her."
"She is indeed a fine woman, sir."
"Stop gossiping about me, you two." His wife gave Muca a saucy look as she switched the baby from one breast to the other, giving Muca a momentary glimpse of a brown nipple. Her nipples grow erect at the beautiful sight.
The farmer laughed and slapped Muca on the back, making her tip forward, nearly losing her balance. "Tell me more about this Marquis of Carabas. Why have we never seen him in these parts?"
"He's new to this region. My Marquis is a very busy man. He has recently returned from China after hunting down some rare herbs and exotic textiles. A sultan introduced him to his youngest daughter, and although my Marquis was flattered, he simply couldn't bring himself to take her as his bride. Just this past month, an Italian countess courted him! Italy is far too distant a land for his taste, since he prefers Eastern Europe, so he had to let her down easy. He has toured many kingdoms from here to the sea, and he likes this area best. As a matter of fact, he's looking for land here, and he would love to own the fields you harvest."
"Little chance of that happening. I doubt Derp would give up his lands without a fight." He waved an arm towards the field, and for the first time Muca saw a checkerboard pattern built into the soy field. "Derp made us deface our soy field for his own entertainment."
"What on earth is that?" Muca eyed up the field, trying to make sense of what she saw. She expected life-sized chess piece bishops and knights to take their places on the squares.
"It's a game board for Derp's latest form of entertainment that costs us a fortune." He threw a towel to the ground. His brows knitted together, face contorted with rage and frustration. "It's for a game Derp calls "Cow Patty Checkers". He demands everyone in town place bets on where his prized steer will drop a load, and we always lose. Derp has stolen much money from us with this dreadful game."
"What's "Cow Patty Checkers"?"
"Everyone places bets on which block the steer will grace with its shit. Then, Derp releases the animal onto the field. We wait while it takes its good old time wandering from block to block, munching on clover and swatting flies with its tail. Then, it squats over a square and takes a huge dump - always on the square Derp has chosen. We are robbed like this at least two or three times each month."
