Guilty Pleasure - Lara Croft and Tomb Raider

I recently saw the new Tomb Raider movie with my husband, Bill. Tomb Raider is one of my favorite game series. In fact, it was the second video game I ever played. Although heroine Lara Croft started out as not much more than a series of pixels with big boobs designed for male players, she outgrew her limitations and became in my mind something more. She was much more than a sex symbol to me. Lara was popular with men and women, boys and girls. The guys wanted to possess her. Women and girls wanted to be her.  When I worked lighting for stage, TV, concerts, and movies I was as buff as Lara Croft. I even had the ponytail. She was everything I wanted to be – confident, strong, cheeky, gorgeous, energetic, rich.

I didn't see the character fleshed out until I read some of the comic books. Those comics gave her a backstory. She was very close to her father and relished the idea of traveling the world in search of puzzles to solve that helped her find answers to the biggest puzzle of all – herself. The first two movies starring Angelina Jolie brought more of these ideas forward. When I first heard the first movie was being shot, I told Bill the only one who could play her was Angelina Jolie. Jolie had all the make-up to play Lara. She was bigger-than-life. A little weird. Cheeky sense of humor. Beautiful. Full of energy. A bit of a loner (according to the types of roles she played). Had daddy issues. She certainly looked the part.

When the game first appeared, Bill was working as a producer at Hasbro. Due to his contacts, he managed to pick up a CD of the original soundtrack that included songs that weren't on the final soundtrack that was released to the public. I grabbed that soundtrack which consisted mostly of my favorite music genre, techno, and played it day and night. This was before the movie came out. On the way to the movie theater to see it, we played the CD in the car. I loved the movie despite it faults mainly because Jolie did such a good job depicting Lara.

Lara has evolved over the years. She's now less a pair of gigantic boobs and more a person in her own right. I've always seen Lara as a blank slate upon which I and I'm sure other female fans projected their own desires and aspirations. Through the character, those of us on the shy side could experiment with expressing ourselves. We became stronger both mentally and physically if that's what we wanted.

This is all very ironic since Lara was originally envisioned by British game company Eidos (now Square Enix) as a male Indiana Jones-type character complete with fedora and bullwhip. The character was changed to a Hispanic female named Laura Cruz, and then evolved into the English heiress Lara Croft as a hat tip to the developers. The latest movie, which sadly has garnered horrible reviews, depicts Lara more realistically, with a muscular and athletic build that doesn't focus on her breast size. The cheekiness of the character reminiscent of the earlier games and the Angelina Jolie movies has evolved to a more serious even dark manner. Judging from the end of the movie, I see a sequel in the works. I'll likely see it no matter how badly it is reviewed assuming it's made. I simply adore Lara Croft.

So I'll dig up and enjoy my Lara Croft dioramas, my pewter Lara Croft, my Tomb Raider socks and beach towels, my Lara Croft iPhone case, and the rest of my extensive Tomb Raider collection. It's a good thing to have such a fun template to aspire to. I can be anyone I want. And I'll enjoy the hell out of it.

New Column - Naughty Words

I have a new column at Novelspot I've called Naughty Words. I'll talk about romance, erotica, writing, and whatever floats my boat. Next up here - my first blog post at Naughty Words!

Women Who Refuse To Take Their Husband's Surnames

I found this article about women who did not take their husband's surnames upon marriage interesting and I do agree with it to some extent. I took my first husband's surname. That marriage ended in an ugly divorce. I kept my maiden name when I married my second husband, and we're going strong over 20 years later. Take all that as you like.

I kept my maiden name because it's my name. I am already known well by that name. I  used it for my past political and feminist writing. I am aware of the irony of my maiden name coming from my father – another man – but I didn't sign over my identity by changing my name upon marriage. That's how I see name changing for me personally. I already have an identity and I didn't want the hassle of changing a multitude of legal forms. I could have taken my maiden name as my middle name and my husband's name as my married name but I rejected that, too. I did that for my first marriage. Switching back and forth before and after that marriage was a pain in the ass.

The problem is that the description of men whose wives do not take their surnames as being perceived as being "less masculine"  in the article from the Independent seems to be seen as a negative thing. Far from it. How do we define what is masculine? The traditional definition seems to me to be somewhat harmful to men. Some positive attributes considered masculine include being assertive and ambitious. However, "real" men are also strong who keep their emotions in check. Big boys don't cry. Brute force is a positive thing. And what's wrong with a man being seen as more feminine? A balance between stereotypes would go a long way towards showing more humanity.

Those who decried the research (the term "hostile sexism" was thrown about) thought of men whose wives did not take their surnames were "disempowered as a result of their wife’s decision." That's a load of crap.

This statement also intrigued me: "A woman's marital surname choice therefore has implications for perceptions of her husband's instrumentality, expressivity, and the distribution of power in the relationship," explains lead author Rachael Robnett. My marriage is not traditional. The power is evenly distributed throughout our relationship. There is no God-ordained leader in my household. I'm not submissive and when I'm upset or angry I feel free to express myself without repercussions, unlike my first marriage. That's not related to whether or not I took my husband's name but due to the nature of each marriage.

I also kept my maiden name upon my second marriage because I had taken his surname for my first marriage. I had done it once and didn't see a need to do it again. I also didn't have a traditional white wedding for my second wedding. We had a nondenominational ceremony in our backyard with me in a green lace dress. The town clerk officiated. Our sons and my son's best friend attended. Then we went inside, had my chocolate sachertorte wedding cake I had baked and watched Hellraiser. Hey, there are newlyweds in that movie! It's appropriate!

I am probably viewed as non-traditional in my marriage, my actions, and beliefs. According to previous studies, "women who violate the marital surname tradition are viewed differently from others. They are described in terms of instrumental traits that in a gendered society are typically assigned to men. These include having a higher status, wielding more power, being more self-focused, ambitious and assertive. These traits contrast with the expressive characteristics that are typically assigned to women, such as being more nurturing, kind and having less influence and power." My husband freely expresses his emotions like sadness and insecurity as well as anger. Why is anger seen as a masculine emotion? I see why nurturing is seen as feminine since women traditionally have raised children, but that is not an exclusively feminine characteristic.

My point in this rambling post is that keeping my maiden name was a personal choice between me and my husband with my feelings being paramount. Maybe it reflects the dynamics of my second marriage, maybe not. I just know that traditional definitions of masculinity and femininity can be harmful to both men and women. It's time we viewed ourselves as individual human beings with our own wants and needs and not be held hostage by stereotypes.

What I Am Thankful For

Thursday, Nov. 23 was Thanksgiving in the United States. It's a holiday dedicated to when the Native Americans and American colonists broke bread together. It's a day of remembering what you are thankful for.

It's also a day of massive, bloat-worthy Triptophan turkey dinners, insane political talk from Crazy Uncle Joe at the dinner table, greedy shopping binges, and kids flushing their underwear down the toilet so that you have to pay the exorbitant Holiday fee to have a plumber unclog it. It's all about family get-togethers and good cheer in between two much pumpkin pie and copious amounts of cheap wine that loosens tongues.

I was hanging out on FARK, my favorite not-news social media aggregator, when I saw a post about "what are you thankful for today?" The comments included the usual snark like:

A couple hours ago my cat walked right up to my feet and immediately puked. I thanked her for missing my feet. But not my socks I left under my desk last night. Did make clean up easy.

My cat came up to me in bed and expressed displeasure of hosting 2 dogs by projectile vomiting on me. Intimacy, I am thankful for.

Health, familial stability, kindness and understanding. And all you assholes, I'm thankful y'all're here too.

I have weed.

I woke up again today. That was good.

Living in a country where I can buy one of those enormous containers of Utz cheese balls.

Most comments were sincere though, and they reminded me of what I am thankful for.

I am thankful that I don’t have to cook Thanksgiving dinner. If you're not American, have you ever seen a Thanksgiving dinner? There's a picture of it next to the word "gluttony" in the dictionary.

I also have weed.

I have good health and a husband who loves me very much.

I know better than to talk about religion and especially politics at the dinner table today or any other day for that matter.

My son is doing well. He has a job he loves but he needs to find his own place. He's working on that.

My husband is doing well. He's retiring in about two years. He's my soulmate. I don't know what I'd do without him.

My two blind cats. They love snuggles and petting and they keep me entertained.

I have the ability to write freely. I wish I were paid better but I have writing freedom lots of people don't have. I also get support for my writing from my family which I understand lots of writers don't have.

So on this Thanksgiving 2017, I wanted to write about what I was thankful for. I know I'm very fortunate, and I will not look a gift horse in the mouth. So now that the holiday season has started whether you live in or outside the U. S., get those lights lit and that tree up. Wrap those gifts. Enjoy the endless streams of Christmas music (or gouge your ears out with an ice pick, whichever applies). Seasonal affective disorder doesn't start for me until January so I'm going to enjoy this good mood while I can. Happy holidays, everyone!

Special Promo: The Naughty List

The Naughty List

Edited by Cori Vidae

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GENRE: Romance anthology (sweet to erotic)

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BLURB:

Six holiday romances, from sexy to sweet, prove that love is better on the Naughty List.

A Christmas Maggie by Tiffany Reisz

All Daniel wanted for Christmas was to spoil his new girlfriend, Anya, make love under the tree, and ignore all his old heartaches. But the ghosts of Christmas past aren’t so easily forgotten especially when Maggie, his late wife, shows up to remind him why the past should stay in the past and why his Christmases-future could be the best of his life if he can finally let himself live and love in this Christmas present. (A Christmas Maggie is the final story in the Daniel trio [from the Original Sinners series] beginning with The Gift and followed by Daniel Part Two.)

Christmassy by Alexa Piper

When taotien Valerion and witchling Cora get together sparks fly. But on the way to visit Cora’s family for Christmas, they encounter a supernatural predator that will not only test their individual powers and abilities, but also their connection to one another.

My Midnight Cowboy by Pumpkin Spice

If chocolate is the way to a man’s heart, then pastry chef Lucy Baker has the recipe for success. But will her culinary skills melt the most hard-hearted bachelor in Wyoming? A chance encounter on a New Year’s Eve flight leaves two strangers to discover unbound pleasure and a hunger for sexual discovery.

In the Doghouse by Elizabeth Black

Nicky and Angela had just begun to add a little kink to their lives when, caught up in the influence of his dudebros he forgot their anniversary and broke Angela’s heart. Angela wants Nicky’s strong arms around her again, but first she wants him to fight for her. Can one night, a paddle and some restraints bridge the gap between them?

Winter’s Daughter by Doug Blakeslee

A child of the Fae—bound to winter and a promise given to her chosen mate. She must claim him before time runs out and all she loves in the world falls to ruin. A child of mortals—forgotten and discarded by the world, then torn from the most amazing woman he’s ever met. Trapped in the sort of fae-tale that rarely ends in happily ever after, are they strong enough to defy the odds and find love?

Stealing Time by Wendy Sparrow

As Father Time’s son, Zeit must sacrifice a mortal’s lifetime to the Fates each New Year’s Eve. Last year—inexplicably, really—he made an 11:59 substitution. The Fates are pissed and they’re after his mortal Hannah. With the year ending, he ought to figure out why he’d saved her—and and why he keeps doing it. Following an unlucky year, Hannah needs a week’s holiday in a lodge to unwind. What she gets is near-death experiences and a sexy immortal who can’t avoid kissing her, but might have to kill her. After all, even Zeit can’t hold back time indefinitely.

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EXCERPT:

From A Christmas Maggie by Tiffany Reisz

Daniel sat forward in the chair, suddenly more awake than he’d ever been in his entire life. In front of him kneeling on the floor by his feet with her chin on his knee was Maggie, his wife who had been dead and buried for years.

“What?” he asked again, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. “What are you doing here?”

She gave him a wicked blue-eyed smile, her chestnut hair falling in waves around her oval face. She didn’t look a day over thirty-five, younger than he’d ever seen her. In fact she looked breathtaking—so young, so beautiful, so untouched by the pain and suffering the cancer had inflicted on her, the cancer that had killed his beautiful wife.

“Merry Christmas, Daniel.”

AUTHOR Bio and Links:

In addition to being an Assistant Editor for World Weaver Press, Cori Vidae likes to write steamy stories and collect shiny things. And when she’s not on Twitter at @CoriVidae you can find her at her website at www.corividae.com

Buy Links:  NOTE: THE BOOK IS ON SALE FOR $0.99

Official page: http://www.worldweaverpress.com/naughty-list

All Romance eBooks: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-thenaughtylist-1937563-166.html?referrer=50ccb934e8fd0

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B018O3CTR6/

Barnes & Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-naughty-list-tiffany-reisz/1123035602

Kobo: https://store.kobobooks.com/en-us/ebook/the-naughty-list-25

Cori Vidae Links:

Website: http://www.corividae.com/shiny/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/CoriVidae

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CoriVidae/

One randomly drawn commenter will receive a Christmas present as a prize for the tour. Like any good Christmas present its contents are a surprise but it will include at least one signed book, something homemade, and a bunch of other fun goodies.

Enter to win a Christmas present – a Rafflecopter giveaway

Thank you to all who enter and to those who buy the book. Being I am one of the authors, I'm proud to be a part of this anthology. Enjoy the read and Happy Holidays!